Pee on the floor.

Tonight my daughter peed on the floor.

That's right, she waited too long and struggled to get her underwear down in time. But she knew what she did and came running out with a fresh pull-up because it was time for bed and she knew what to do. SO I guess that's a plus. And now my bathroom floor is clean so that's one chore I can check off the list that never ends.

I'm watching to Ice Age for the millionth time, Claire is still refusing to sleep in her own room so her toddler bed is down here. She's rolling around in my bed jostling my carefully organized piles of homework that I've laid out in order of importance.

She just farted on my leg.

Sigh.

She pointed to her butt and said "fawrt" before smiling at me with her binky in her mouth and rolling away. Sig and Manny just caught her attention - they're in the ice cave with Diego and the baby, sliding down the ice chute yelling, she's got her hands in the air yelling "yaaaaayyy!"

I love my job.

Mason just ran into my room to tell me he just killed someone important in some video game that I'll never remember the name of. Oh and "I spilled your candle burner thingy, sorry." I paused while writing this blog. "I guess that means there's wax all over the place now?"

Sigh.

"Well we will just have to wait til it cools and then scrape it off." It's bright red, all over the counter and refrigerator. Double sigh.

Amelia is asleep for the moment, I go back to my writing and the phone rings.
"Hey honey."
"Hi, kids asleep?"
"Nope."
"Can you put me on speaker?"
"Claire say hi!"
She talks to her daddy, kisses the phone and in the process hangs up on him. Stupid iPhone touch screen.

"Hello?"
"Oops, she was kissing you goodnight."
"I figured." Chuckles ensue.

Today my husband got pulled over in whatever state he's in right now - I can't remember - by the FBI and State Highway Patrol. They closed the highway he was on because Joe Biden was en route on the same road. He sat there for a few hours before they let everyone back on the highway.

A month ago he was on the same airplane from Washington D.C. after a layover with Hillary Clinton. I'm not kidding -  I have pictures and he sat next to one of her secret service guys.

Claire just kicked me in the boob. I suppose that her limit has been reached for not having my attention, so I guess I should go before she figures out how to use the remote and orders a porn on pay-per-view.